So Long Daddy Warbucks! Hello Hard-knock Life!

Today I was doing some serious mathematics and I arrived at the following answers:

Question 1: How many days left until Graduation?

Answer: Less than 60

Question 2: How many days left until life on a full scholarship* is over?

Answer: Less than 80

*For those unfamiliar with what the Duchess of Disaster Full Scholarship entails it goes a little something like this. Once upon a time back in 1987(M) Mommy & (D)Daddy Disaster decided they would fully fund all of the Duchesses expenses until January 1st following her college graduation.

Basically, I feel like an actress who did not get her contract renewed on the Emmy Award winning sitcom she has starred in since birth. Like most actors who get canned on a Primetime show, I'm about to enter an unknown era where the security of my youth is nothing but a memory in the past. Despite my fear of the unknown, I am encouraged that so many of you are conquering the boardrooms of big girl world.

Instead of prematurely embracing Mommy's famous response to my daily disasters or in this case, the next chapter in my life "Put on your big girl panties and deal with it", I've decided to share three of my favorite explanations for exceeding my allotted monthly scholarship budget.

The summer before college I was in St. Simons at the beach with some friends. D had just issued my first credit card and instructed me it was only for emergencies and gas. My first emergency occurred on the last day of our 4 day stay. Before we hit the road we decided to stop at the Tibi Outlet to shop around. I thought to myself "a few purchases totally qualify as a fashion emergency". After I had decided what to buy I went to the register to pay for my purchases and swipe "plastic money" for the first time. 30 minutes later, after going through my entire suit case and purse we decided the card was officially lost. This meant I couldn't buy anything from Tibi and I had no credit card, so my friends and I decided I should call the company any cancel the card. Good thing I knew all the information necessary for a transaction like this because I ended up canceling D's credit card by mistake as well. Later that night when we arrived home I was greeted at the door by Mommy who informed me that D tried to pick up the tab for dinner out with clients and his credit card was mysteriously declined. I not only got in trouble for losing the card, but also for trying to condone shopping for clothes as an emergency.

Luckily, the rest of the summer my credit card purchases were minimal. Things changed when I arrived in Auburn that fall. One afternoon I received an e-mail that read:

From: D@daddywarbucks.com

To: Duchess

Darling Duchess,

Glad you're studying so much at Sky Bar Cafe, they must have great coffee, since you buy thirty dollars worth every Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. We'll have to get a cup when M and I come down for the game next weekend.

xxx,

D

The next weekend he accepted the fact his only daughter had fully emerged herself into the college experience. After all Sky Bar Cafe is a bar that serves anything but coffee. During that same visit, D also inquired about my frequent purchases at a Gas Station called the Chevron. It took him about 30 seconds to realize that I wasn't getting gas but instead shopping for beer. My under the radar spending was overlooked until my first Christmas Break home from college. The day after Christmas he received a notice in the mail I had accumulated almost $1000.00 in parking tickets.

Maybe tomorrow I will embrace life as a Frugalista....

D.D.