To my loyal readers… Happy 2010! You knew I’d be back… You also knew I wouldn’t be able bid farewell to 2009 without some sort of monumental disaster….here we go!
As if its not blatantly obvious… I’m quite the nostalgic one, so don’t act surprised a conversation between mommy & I circa 1994 is completely relevant! It went a little something like this:
Duchess: Mommy, why is Frances in first grade again? I thought she was a year older than me?
Mommy: She is older than you, but the first grade loved her so much, she gets to be a first grader again!
Duchess: So I can be a first grader forever? (I mean who wouldn’t want to live life in a smocked dress, with a huge bow and no front teeth for all of eternity!)
Just when I thought my college career was complete, I found myself in a similar situation to my classmate Frances. College loved me just as much as the first grade loved her and just as I expected the world kept moving despite my failed attempts to press pause. The holidays were in full swing and the hustle and bustle of the holidays did anything but dim the gigantic magnitude of disaster my unexpected change in plans caused.
I anticipated the awkward cocktail chatter during my family’s full social calendar to be the worst I would experience since announcing my new graduation date.Boy was I wrong! Announcing I hadn’t graduated did not seem to stop the generosity of graduation gift-givers! I had two choices (A) Not open them until May & appear unappreciative for what I’d received or (B) Open the present and write the thank-you-note.
Of course I chose option (B)….. This led to my current tift with non other than Miss Manners herself, Emily Post.
Dear Emily Post,
Your guidance on proper etiquette and social graces has proved to be an invaluable resource. Although I’ve typically found your advice to be very helpful, your texts are inept in providing solutions for damage control on my most recent and monumental disaster. For example: the advice you provide on calling off a wedding(even though pushing graduation back felt like that) and returning gifts was not applicable, along with the information on notes sent to those who’ve paid respects due a death in the family(even though I mourned the loss of my December graduation date). As a result I was forced to the following…..
*Note 1:
Dear Mr. & Mrs. X,
The monogrammed linen pillowcases are absolutely lovely. Your family was so thoughtful to remember my inability to graduate this December. I’ve dreamed of sleeping on linen pillowcases for sometime. However, it brings me much sadness to mention I put them on E-bay due to the fact I’m completing a full fifth year of college!Happy New Year! Hopefully I will get it right in 2010!
Love,
The Duchess
*Note 2:
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Z,
The chic picture frame you sent me for graduation is already on my mantle! Although the frame is currently empty it is a daily reminder of my inability to graduate this December. Hopefully, I will fill it with a picture from my spring graduation! Maybe I will have a tan by then! Don’t count on it…..the tan that is! Happy New Year!
Love,
The Duchess
Of course these notes were intercepted by mommy & less cynical notes of appreciation were issued immediately.
Regardless if I like it or not.... here I am for the second half, fourth quarter...okay actually I'll admit it... it's double over-time at this point! Glad to be back!
xxx D.D.
Well I'm glad I didn't send you a graduation gift. So what are you going to do different this time?
ReplyDeleteWould love to see you.
C.